Tuesday, December 8, 2009

TONIGHT is the last chance to sign up for Ireland 2010. I know it's expensive, and I know that times are tight, but if you have a yen to travel, this is a great opportunity. See me or Amy Cotton or Corry Maguire for details, and the meeting is in my room at 7 p.m. Brief but scintillating.

Today's lessons, barring another unwelcome visit from the Fire Marshal (who ordered me to get rid of my Christmas tree, but We Have a Plan that largely involves James Parker running out the back door, cradling said tree and rushing it to my car, in the event of a return visit):

Gifted English II: Final FCAT-tery of the semester with an essay. The topics are predictable, but you are smart, so make it work, people. Make it work. Ten points if ya do. And tomorrow--the wrap-up of satire, and the beginning of my All-Time Favorite Lecture Like, Ever on how history and literature intertwine. You'll laugh, you'll cry; it's better than Cats. Truly.

APeeps: Hamlet Unit Test, followed by distribution of the second Hamlet focus paper. You knew it had to be coming, eh? This one is awesome, though, because it is DIRECTLY aligned to the FRQs of the AP Lit exam. And it's Hamlet-centric! What's not to like? Well, I can imagine, but at this stage of the game I am more invested in your getting college credit than in your short-term happiness. :-)

Hamlet Review: Test is Tomorrow!

If you know all of this stuff, you should be fine tomorrow on ye olde Hamlet test. (And you know how I feel about superfluous vowels, so that's really saying something. Don't even get me going on the illogical spelling of Seminole Towne Centre Shoppes. It's in SANFORD, not SANFOURDE.)

Know this! And you will rock the casbah!

Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
Characters to Know

Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
Hamlet the Elder (ghost), Fortinbras the Elder, Old Norway: The Trifecta of Old
Claudius
Gertrude

Polonius
Laertes
Ophelia
Players and Player King
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern
Horatio

Osric
Reynaldo

Gravedigger
Yorick

Themes to Know and Understand
Denmark as a garden
The play-within-the-play motif (know both titles--"The Murder of Gonzago" and "Mousetrap")
Rottenness
The role of the supernatural
The role of philosophy
The significance of three sons mourning three dead fathers
Graveyard imagery

Action v. intellect
Sexual imagery

Final Thoughts:

1. Remember how to spell "soliloquy" and what it means.

2. Review the insults Hamlet gives to Polonius.

3. Understand that this is NOT a typical Aristotilean tragedy, but is rather the first "modern" one in that sense of the word; Macbeth was a medieval play with Renaissance overtones, whereas Hamlet is Renaissance to the max. Hamlet, despite his myriad of character flaws, is an essentially good man fighting a corrupt universe.

4. Understand Horatio's complex role, perhaps even as significant as providing a narrative "voice" for us.

Cheer Pressure

To celebrate the Recession that is plaguing America, I am reposting my suggestion list from my now-defunct LiveJournal blog, with a couple of edits. So read on, if you feel the need. Pardon any irreverence in the tone; 'tis the season to be stressed out! Falalalalalalalalala.

This post is strictly meant to be helpful.

Did you know that the average American family will go into debt over holiday presents?

And that the average holiday expenditure per family of four is over one thousand dollars?

And that everyone seems to want something out of you on the holiday trainwreck--whether it be get-togethers, expanding tipping for the people who provide services throughout the year, or the incessantly tinntinnabulous bellringers outside of local constabulatories?

So, Hilley has solutions for you. Of course, I'd like to suggest gently that we just stop with all of the gift-giving, but that would be really hypocritical of me since I lurve giving presents to people. LOVE IT. I love all of it--selecting them, wrapping them lovingly a la Martha Stewart, and watching with glee as the recipient(s) opens my carefully-contemplated schwag. Love it.

What I don't love is the pre-holiday anxiety about how in the heck I plan to pay for all of this material joy.

So, short of standing on street corners with a sign stating Will Conjugate/Edit/Proselytize for Christmas Money, I have been casting about for financially sound holiday solutions for Loved Ones, and I want to share my new-found wisdom with you.

NEW SUGGESTIONS FOR 2009's CONTINUING ECONOMIC CRISIS:

1A. Just tell your friends and family that the recession is hitting you particularly hard, and you will be praying for them/thinking of them/writing poetry in honor of them in lieu of presents. How can anyone argue with that?

1B. Write up lovely cards stating that you donated to The Human Fund in their name to celebrate Festivus.

1C. Just promise to not discuss politics with them for the next twelve months in lieu of a tangible gift. Most of us would appreciate that, especially if your political views are Wrong and theirs are Correct. In their estimation, of course.

1D. Go to sleep on the 23rd and awaken on the 26th, holiday over. Then hit the 80% off sales, beg for forgiveness, and enjoy the savings.

Now on to the suggestion list from last year, reposted in lieu of a present to many, many of you, because I love you and because I apparently love handbags more than I love you. My apologies. And NONE of these places have given me anything to write about them, so please don't accuse me of being overly commercial.

1. Do not re-gift, unless you are ABSOLUTELY certain that the original gift-giver has moved to Saskatchewan and that the new recipient will not be posting pictures of the new bling on Facebook or whatever. In our newly savvy techno-age, there are a myriad of ways in which a regifter can be busted. I speak from vicarious experience, since my BFF has regifted virtually every gift I've ever given her. . .to me. In recent years I've gotten smart and only given her expendables, like face cream or a gift card. You'd be amazed at what that woman is willing to return, and in what condition, and without what receipts. She is so lucky I love her. (Note from 2009: For her birthday on 11/21, I gave her something I liked just in case it finds its way under my tree on the 25th.)

2. Homemade presents are always great, but be careful that you don't end up spending more money on the materials than you would have on some pre-made stuff of similar ilk. Five years ago, BFF and I went soap-crazy and made homemade soaps for all of our beloveds. While some of the soaps were well-received (and some were hilarious--like the one we filled with toenail clippings, and the one we filled with leftover Ramen Noodles) the average cost per bar of soap was over eight bucks. In other words, NOT COST-EFFICIENT.)

3. Hit the dollar spot at T____ (national discount chain with a bullseye logo). They have amazing stuff there, and, more importantly, they have really good-quality gift wrap and bows for A DOLLAR. Failing that, start saving unusual shopping bags, pieces of paper, and fabric for unique gift-wrap. Those card-stock, unrecycle-able community newsletters? Great giftwrap, guaranteed to raise eyebrows! And I'd also like to point out that P___ (local grocery store chain) has nice reusable grocery bags with festive prints--pop a gift in, close it, and you have two gifts in one!

4. For those of you who are girly: This website has Sephora-level quality cosmetics for a dollar apiece, and gift sets in the five/ten/fifteen dollar range: http://www.eyeslipsface.com. Their packaging is good and the shipping prices are decent.

5. For those of you are super-girly, try this website, where every piece of jewelry is "free" (actually, 6.99 for shipping, but when it arrives the stamp says 82 cents, but whatever): www.silverjewelryclub.com

6. For those of you with a slightly higher budget and a quirky sense of humor, try any of these websites: www.fredflare.com,www.blueq.com, and www.perpetualkid.com.

7. There is absolutely nothing wrong with finding something vintage and amazing at Goodwill Boutique--especially the one near Park Avenue in Winter Park. Dechoes is good, too, if you are looking for something in particular.

8. If you have a slightly higher discretionary income and want your money to go to good use, you can't beat the fair-trade handmade bags at Amani Ya Juu, which I'm getting for my mom, sister, and sister-in-law this season. All of the proceeds go to the women in the tribe. Special thanks to the Chitty family for their hands-on work with this organization. www.amaniafrica.org.

9. You cannot underestimate the power of a deed or an event. Offer to take a younger sibling out for an afternoon, or pack a picnic for your sig-o, or offer to help the disorganized adult in your life redo her filing system, or whatever. Write the offer in a nice card and revel in the money you're saving--and the real impact you might be creating.

10. Also, don't underestimate the power of your own talents. Burn a DVD of a film you've made, or a performance in which you participated, and include a detailed write-up; take your oddest/most innovative playlist and commemorate it on a CD; make a painting, or write a poem, or short story; if you have leftover art materials from previous craft projects, get creative and see what you can make. Grandparents will squee in glee; little kids will love it; your friends may tease you but secretly adore it.

Final note: You really do not have to get presents for teachers, although the greediest among us do love bling. Overweening giftage can be awkward, and the majority of us would really prefer a heartfelt note wishing us a nice holiday and saying how the class is going so far. Save your money; buy your girl/boyfriend something, go to the movies, go buy a book and READ IT. Then write me a note about how you used the money you almost blew on an apple paperweight or bookmark and how much you really love literature, and we're gravy. Of course, if you are a millionaire, I would like to mention how much I like Starbucks.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

Monday, December 7, 2009

My final sales meeting for the Ireland trip is TOMORROW NIGHT at 7 p.m. This is an all-ages trip, so sophys and seniors are both eligible. We have a few spots open, so if you are interested, come to the meeting OR see me ASAP for the paperwork. We will be in Ireland for Spring Break 2010, and it is my last trip with students for a long time--perhaps forever. Come join us; Corry Maguire, Amy Cotton, and Lizzy Girdley organized this trip and designed the itinerary!

Gifted English II: Edusoft Benchmark Testing, part I--Reading Comprehension. (Tomorrow is Writing.) 10 points for participating. Please bring a pencil.

APees: Hopefully, we will take care of your Bright Futures today; regardless, we need to finish reviewing for tomorrow's amazing test. Oh, and see the following:

HAMLET'S MADNESS!

WAS HE MAD?

The YES, HE WAS MAD side:

• Hamlet appears to act mad when he hears of his father’s murder. At the time he speaks "wild and whirling words." [Act I, Scene v, lines 127-134]
• Hamlet’s behaviour throughout the play, especially towards Ophelia is very erratic.
• He professes to be the only one who truly loves her, during the fight with Laertes in Ophelia's grave, but he tells her that he never loved her, when she returns his letters and gifts.
• His mood changes abruptly throughout the play.
• He jumps aboard a pirate ship without anyone to back him up.
• He jumps into Ophelia's grave, and fights with Laertes in her grave.
• He has Rosencrantz and Guildenstern killed, even though they were not part of his revenge-against-his-father's-murder plan.
• He alone sees his father's ghost in his mother's chamber. Every other time the ghost appeared someone else has seen it. During this scene he finally shows his madness, because his mother does not see the ghost. [Act III, scene iv, ~ line 105]
• He has violent outbursts towards his mother.
• Hamlet tells Laertes that he killed Polonius in a "fit of madness". [Act V, Scene ii, lines 236-250]
• He kills Polonius and will not tell anyone where the body is.

The NO, HE WAS SANE side:

• Hamlet tells Horatio that he is going to "feign madness," and that if Horatio notices any strange behavior from Hamlet, it is because he is putting on an act. [Act i, Scene v, lines 166-180]
• Hamlet's madness only manifests itself when he is in the presence of certain characters. When Hamlet is around Polonius, Claudius, Gertrude, Ophelia, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, he behaves irrationally. When Hamlet is around Horatio, Bernardo, Francisco, The Players and the Gravediggers, he behaves rationally.
• Claudius confesses that Hamlet's "actions although strange, do not appear to stem from madness." [Act III, Scene i, lines 165-167]
• Polonius admits that Hamlet's actions and words have a "method" to them; there appears to be a reason behind them, they are logical in nature. [Act II, Scene ii, lines 206-207]
• Hamlet's madness in no way reflects Ophelia's true madness, his actions contrast them.
• Hamlet tells his mother that he is not mad, "but mad in craft." [Act III, Scene iv, lines 188-199]
• Hamlet believes in his sanity at all times. He never doubts his control over psyche.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Whew--the return of the sick instructor. What a day.

The substitute yesterday left an amazing note congratulating each of you for your accomplishments, and I thank you. What a great guy.

Gifted English II: Finish the Media Literacy sub-unit for Satire and Critical Thinking.

APees: Review for Hamlet Unit Test on Tuesday. Good times!!!

Epic Fail/Update

Dear Students,

Let's do the negative part first, then move on to Optimism Now!

If a substitute ever does something that you KNOW isn't part of the lesson plan, you have my permission to get up, walk next door to Mrs. Nicoll's room or across the hall to Mrs. Alami's room, and tattle. The substitute instructor I had yesterday violated about four rules when she decided to not follow my lesson plan, acquire a DVD player from the Media Center (!) and show Taming of the Shrew all day long--which is NOT part of my scope and sequence. When she wasn't discussing fashion magazines with you.

Now, I know beggars can't be choosers, and I certainly didn't plan to get an epic level of stomach flu that has made me wish fervently for a vacation from myself, but c'mon. I was fifteen kinds of furious today. Then, the sweet little sub who showed up today kept assuring me, "You will be SAT-is-FIIIIIIIED," so I hope that worked out, fire drills notwithstanding.

And please forgive the bitter tone and tenor of this post. I feel icky.

Now, on to GOOD THINGS FOR YOU!!!

1. Bright Futures will be handled Monday or Wednesday in the AP classes; you won't have to do much but show up and get the information. You will be able to handle your financial aid online and monitor your own account, so above all else do NOT lose this vital data. Hang on to your username and password in about six different places, as it is very difficult to get DOE to redo either.

2. Hamlet test is officially on Tuesday.

3. Progress reports go home tomorrow, but they are inaccurate and unnaturally skewing higher than actual averages in some cases. Which gives you two options: revel in the joy and avoid being grounded, or ask me for a printout of Where You Really Are.

4. Poetry reading is tomorrow after school in 313 with Covert/Hilley co-hosting. Everyone is welcome to attend.

Project X-Mas has taken a hit from my recent illness, and we need to redouble our efforts if we want to reward the custodial staff. I will meet with Mary Claire and Katie tomorrow to re-establish our efforts; we need to collect from every classroom, club, and organization on this campus to make this work. Any and all ideas are welcome.

Sophys: Edusoft Benchmark Testing is Monday/Tuesday; for those of you in academic trouble, this presents two golden opportunities for ten points extra in the gradebook. And then we are moving on to finish our Satire/Media Literacy/Snark Unit, preparatory to Shakespeare, which I swear will change your life.

Thanks and happy Thursday; TGIF tomorrow! Much love to all of the peeps.

Sick

In the event that you haven't noticed, I've been out sick for what will now be three days. I have not felt this rotten since the Swine Episode last spring, but it isn't pork-related this time. It's just flu. Blicky, icky, wicky flu.

Consequently: Hamlet test has been postponed until next week. Poetry reading is still tomorrow after school co-hosted by Covert and myself. Hamlet wrap-up and transition will begin tomorrow in class. Please be nice to the sub, even if she does read you beauty tips from fashion magazines. (Or so a student told me in a rambunctious text message.)

I will be at school Thursday morning for first period only due to lack of sub, giving the open-book Candide assessment to the sophys. Sophomores: You can return Candide to the Media Center on Friday; don't forget that we have Benchmark testing Monday and Tuesday. Exciting times at BHS!

I hope no one overdosed on pancakes during the Honors Breakfast. Love to all.